Dallas Sucks Golden Ale

Review Date 1/2/2025 By John Staradumsky

  Style: Blonde Ale   Brewery: Weyerbacher   Country: USA   State: Pennsylvania   $ Per OZ: $.25 (B)   ABV: 5%

Apparently, Dallas Sucks. At least, it does according to the Weyerbacher Brewing Company of Easton, Pennsylvania. We should be clear here, though, that we are not talking about Dallas, the city. We are talking about Dallas, the football team. AKA, the Dallas Cowboys. Hence, we get Dallas Sucks, a golden ale from Weyerbacher.

Context is critical here. Easton is about 72 miles from Philadelphia; prime Eagles country. The Eagles and Cowboys have a longstanding rivalry with the Cowboys. There’s more, though. Easton is only about 75 miles from East Rutherford New Jersey, where the New York Giants play. The Eagles and the Giants have a longstanding rivalry, too, but there is one thing their fans can agree on:

Dallas sucks.

Both of their fanbases despise the Dallas Cowboys, divisional rivals, you see. This is the very basis of football, of course. Weyerbacher, wise in its marketing ways, sells Dallas Sucks in two different packages, a green can for Eagles fans and a blue one for Giants fans. Both are marked “FOR THE FANS.”

The beer inside, is a golden/blonde ale of strength 5% alcohol by volume. I paid $3.49 for a single 12-ounce can from Half Time Beverage. Total Wine sells it for $12.99 a six-pack in Friendship Heights, DC. Ironically enough, the heart of Commanders territory, the final team in the NFC East. No Commanders version of Dallas Sucks that I am aware of. Poor Commanders.

Weyerbacher does not have any information on this beer on their website, but Half Time described it as follows:

This one’s for the FANS! Dallas Sucks is an American Golden Ale that's brewed with American 2 row Pale Malt, a touch of specialty grains and citrusy Centennial hops making for a crushable brew you can enjoy all day long or all game long!

Weyerbacher Dallas Sucks pours to a pale blonde color with a thick but short-lived fizzy head and a nose of crisp biscuit malt. Taking a sip, the beer is as bready in the palate as it is in the nose. It’s quite crisp and biscuity and akin to chewing a fresh handful of malt. What sets this apart from other blonde ales for me is the aggressive hop bitterness, it punctuates the finish nicely and ends the beer long and dry and lingering on the tongue.

Dallas Sucks doesn’t suck, even though it kind of does, if you are an Eagles or Giants fan. It’s a great session beer, though, perfect for enjoyment with an afternoon of football.